Sunday, August 15, 2010

Group Hallucination, Power of Persuasion, Alter State?

I don't speak a lot about my past, I tend to forget most of it. Some of it, primarily my last couple years of High School, I spent with close friends, experimenting and trying dugs of all nature. We didn't do it in an abusive way, but more like scientist, experimenting for that perfect utopia. Only to catch it once in a great while, then spend months just "chasing the dragon". It's not necessary to get into what drugs where taken, but maybe what ones were not. We never touched heroin, we new the high would be to much to replace. We stayed away from bathtub shit like, crack and meth, but stuck more to the natural drugs, things born on this earth.

Day 1 & 2

One night, sometime in October, I believe Friday night, we gathered at Shane's girlfriends house. Her and her parents were gone somewhere for a week. Like most low key get together's it was just myself, Mike, Shane and Lane. Some people came over the first night, we had some beers, smoked some weed and called it a night. Saturday we awoke throughout the house around noon, most everyone had gone by now, just the original named above. We went out to eat that day, probably the first food we had ingested since dinner on Friday. After returning we sat down to watch clerks, then headed down to the basement to try out some new weed that Mike had acquired. With all four of us leaned up against the oversized ferret cage we began to go at it. As the bowl passed around things began to slow down, people in slow motion, darkness set in and your ears seem to be underwater. The four of us finished the final couple rounds while exhaling deep slow motion laughs of excitement. Whatever Mike had stumbled across was our new favorite, but we new this love would be short lived. What we were experiencing could never be done again, we had just this one chance to live it, one chance to take it in for all its glory. When it was all done we quickly began to realize that what it was, was creeper and it was still taking us deeper and deeper. Realizing we were in the belly of the house and lingering near us was an odd looking cat we decided to go upstairs. Up stairs was light, drinks and hope. We new the ultimate show was available, for some reason the home owner had put their Christmas tree up in October. At the bottom of the stairs and the hardest part of our journey, we lined up like preschoolers and prepared to take the journey. Shane our leader, Mike second and myself and Lane following up, we wobbled one step at a time. Around midway up and what seemed to be minutes into the journey Mike had mad a startling conclusion that whatever was in us gave us the ability to float. This may seem fun, but it put a kink in our plan to the Utopian light show upstairs. As Mike reminded us, while latching on to Shane with both hands, he [shane] was the only one who could work the door handle. At this point fear began to set in, if Shane floats off we will never make it home, never drink Squirt or worse, never see the lights. We set in like soldiers on attack, each grabbing the one in front, Shane was our VIP, risk everything, make sure he gets to the door. The door seemed a good mile at this point, using all our strength to grasp one another, keep them from floating off. Lane, last in line, was dealt the most difficult task, maintaining my neutrality to the steps and keeping his own. He later told me that he didn't have to take one step the entire way up, he just flew behind me. After struggling for what seemed an hour, cotton mouth and sweating we had gotten Shane to the door. It was at this time he turned to us and in his saddest face, a look of defeat, he informed us "I can't remember how to open the door". "Think Shane", Mike aggressively yelled back, but it did no good. We could tell from Shane's eyes we had failed. Forgetting our ability to defy gravity we all sat on the steps, lit up our personal favorite cigarettes, mine being Lucky Strike Filtered, and began to ponder. We outed the ideas of waiting a week, digging a hole, fire and using the ferret to get help. I would say two cigarettes in Shane stood up, put his hand on the knob and opened it. He didn't just remember, he wasn't playing a game with us, a higher being, someone way beyond us gave him the knowledge. Shane was now a god and as far as he was concerned he had the ability to conquer anything. We immediately found refuge in the living room, this was safety. I couldn't tell you what the rest of the house was like, I don't remember any of it, not even using the bathroom. Someone had gone to the kitchen and gotten us our pop, we then sat starring at the most beautiful Christmas tree ever. Lights that shinned and streaked, leaped off the tree. It was alive, a romantic orchestra of life and love, this tree filled us with everything that was missing. We laid on the floor, sat in chairs, looked at walls, it didn't matter. The tree was a life form and it was the room now, we were living in it. The only logical thought we produced was that whatever this was, this feeling, couldn't be lost. If we let it go we would never have it again, we had to smoke more. So we did, more and more, we filled our lungs, then the room. Soon the lights began to dim, the beautiful dance the tree had given us for hours was ending as if the tree was dying. The sadness of it all was happening, we were at the point of excessiveness, our minds had taken in too much. So the lights went out, motor skills went away, Utopia was now over.

Day 3

Sunday, sometime in mid afternoon I awoke. Mike had been up for sometime and had found cereal in the kitchen, Shane was trying to not wake up, but you could tell his body was not having it. Lane, was gone, slipped off early morning, I guess he had responsibilities. Waking from an experience like the night before was easy, the upside to drug use is the lack of residual affects. No hangovers, headaches or grogginess. After finishing off the box of cereal we found we went to the living to prepare. I don't have a good time frame, my guess is around 3 or 4 and maybe I had been up for an hour. We decided immediately to try some new stuff and in addition we would be adding mushrooms. Ultimately our goal that weekend was to try Peyote for the first time, but we could not secure it. So fungus in hand we went under and fired up our joint. The shrooms are one thing, controllable happy highs, but what lay waste inside our weed, well that was unexpected. We don't know to this day what it was, we do know it was way beyond our control. Within an hour the lights went out to me, I was done, comatose. When I woke it was to a whole new world. Shane stood in front of me, tree in hand, talking to the angel on top. I couldn't reach him, my hands were detached, no matter how much i tried they just wouldn't touch him. In the distance I heard what seemed to be a waterfall, I wasn't completely sure. With ill attempts to get Shane's attention from touching him I yelled. My scream echoed, you could see the ripples bouncing around the room. At that point, bug eyed and red faced Shane turned to me. He then moved within inches of my face and spoke words that I could not decipher. In a panic I told him, "I can't understand you, please talk to me in human". Slowly he turned his head, as to see no one was listening, handed me another joint and said smoke, so I did. He then told me, "Dolphins can't breathe our air, so I put him in the shower. He's been in too long, needs to eat". I understood completely, joint in mouth, I heard the dolphin crying out from the shower. It was at this point Shane made his move to save the drowning fish and using his new god like abilities he set off. Over the couch and into the drywall, his attempt ended abruptly. In my heart I knew he could walk through walls, but this had to be a force field. Now on the floor, Shane laid half on the Christmas tree, which was now on top of me. I patted him on the head and told him we did everything we could, the dolphin would be happy.

Day 4

I woke up on the floor, Shane's head on my leg and Christmas tree covering me like a blanket. Next to me in the recliner was Mike, in his boxers and tshirt, soaking wet. Apparently he had woken up in the shower. As we looked around at the destruction created last night, we tried to piece it together. Apparently more had happened prior to my waking up, for instance Shane trying to walk through 3 different walls in the living room. As we talked one piece of the night, which seemed impossible, started to come to light. We all remembered a party, a hill, the moon, stars, uncut soft grass and talking to Michelle C. The vividness was astonishing, the exact same stories, feelings, smells, conversations. The openness of the night, the freedom, we all felt it. No one was dressed, had shoes on, nor had the cars been moved. The front door was unlocked and open, we don't now how or why. Did we go somewhere, did we just go outside and the three of us dream we were there? We don't know, we had no physical evidence. Just the vividness of a "perfect" dream, that three people shared together.

2 comments:

Mother Firefly said...

DUDE..... I don't know if this was your intent or not, but I laughed so hard I cried...and when I got to the end of day three when the tree was on top of you and you said the 'dolphin would be happy', I almost fell off my chair.

I know I'm biased because you're my brother, but I REALLY missed your writing and I'm glad you're back. Keep it up.
Love, Your Sister

Jumbo's Lezis said...

I appreciate it. It brings back happy memories to me when I think about it. So if it makes you laugh, all the better